"You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream."
— C.S. Lewis, author and scholar
The Problem
We sometimes believe our best days are behind us
If you're over 50 (or even 40 or 30), you may have more yesterdays than tomorrows. Some of us indeed may grow to be centenarians, but most of us won’t. And if you are 60 or 70, you are well past the halfway point. We all have a shelf life. It’s rational to observe this reality and get depressed.
And it’s not just the ticking clock and the accelerating calendar that bring us down—it’s also the quality of our existence. We're all declining physically and perhaps even cognitively.
Plus, the second or third stage of life can be isolating. You may be recently divorced or widowed. You may be single. Your parents may have passed or are in poor health. You may have recently had to euthanize your ancient and loyal dog whom you loved dearly.
Some of our ideas may prompt friends or relatives to ask, Why are you doing such a thing at your age?
Your kids may have grown more independent—which is great except that you feel less needed. You’ve retired, or you’re close to retiring. This means that those you've interacted with daily fade into memory. You may look forward to retirement, but it can come with unpleasant and unanticipated realities about a loss of identity and feelings of isolation.
Now, that you're filled with dread about aging, take a breath, and put on a smile. This Hack provides strategies that will make the second half of your life something you look forward to.
The Hack
Embrace the Momentum Mindset
When we looked up definitions of momentum, we often found the word movement. We noticed that these definitions of momentum, if not explicitly stated, also implied forward movement or growth.
We define Momentum Mindset as “An established set of attitudes that are devoted to growth.”
The key ingredients of the Momentum Mindset are
- a bold sense of curiosity
- a yearning for adventure
- a willingness to try and fail and then learn and adapt
- a keen desire to have more fun and more joy in your life.
Use the strategies below and embracing the Momentum Mindset should be easy. Plus, it will make your second and third acts more wonderful than you ever imagined.
Over the next twenty-four hours, diagnose what’s missing from your life in terms of engagement.
What you can do tomorrow
When you're young, you want to look good, find love, build wealth, and you’re thrilled when others notice. Now, you need to adjust your focus. Apply your Momentum Mindset not for the approval of others but in pursuit of personal gratification.
Strive for goals that bring you joy. Don’t worry if your peers think that going back to college, learning a new trade, or taking up the guitar at your age is silly. Tell them you have a new attitude, and you're focused on a long, joy-filled life. Try these strategies, and you'll build momentum as early as tomorrow.
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Inventory your limitations. As you age, new limitations emerge and old limitations are more imposing. If you have physical hurdles, or financial challenges, or social obligations, or lack of time because you’re still working, make note of them. Understanding your challenges can fuel your Momentum Mindset. Consider jotting them down on paper. Then, reflect on them, as they can help inform your goals.
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Set a health and fitness goal. We like to compare aging to having a lot of miles on your odometer, which clearly creates an analogy of the body as a vehicle. It’s an apt comparison because our bodies, unfortunately, are also depreciating assets. Unlike a car, there’s no option to trade in your body for a newer model. So if we’re stuck with our bodies, let’s fix them up and make better versions of whatever genetic cocktail we’ve been assigned. If you could improve aspects of your physical well-being, what would they be? Creating clear objectives is a great first step in the Momentum Mindset.
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Set an emotional well-being goal. Getting healthier, feeling good, and looking vibrant are all great objectives, but it's possible to realize your goal of looking and feeling younger and still be fundamentally unhappy. You may feel lonely, unloved, isolated, unneeded, dependent, out-of-touch, or any of the myriad of human deficit emotions. If you could improve aspects of your emotional well-being, what would they be?
The key in the Embrace the Momentum Mindset Hack is to review the goals you set and create a plan of action.
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Set a community engagement goal. Gaining momentum regarding your physical and emotional well-being are worthwhile pursuits, but we also want you to be engaged. This engagement could include exploring passions and developing new ones and also feeling a part of a community, a small social circle, or even an intimate relationship. Over the next twenty-four hours, diagnose what’s missing from your life in terms of engagement. This deficit could be tactile, intellectual, social, or a combination of many factors. What will get you excited about getting up in the morning?
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List things you’d like less of. You don’t have to always add things to build momentum. Think of every reality show about hoarders. The star of the show is always the wise organizer who liberates the hoarder by guiding them to purge unneeded items. The hope is that these acts will build a feng shui-like momentum that will linger after the show moves on. We bet you have some unwanted metaphorical clutter in your After-50s, or 40s, life. It certainly could be material, but often it involves obligations. Some may be to dependent family members. All we want you to do over the next twenty-four hours is list burdens you’d like to decrease. You may be tired of mowing your lawn every five days or the obligation of preparing a large meal every evening. Understanding what you need less of is a meaningful step toward eliminating them and building momentum.
Final word
Some of this post is excerpted from Hacking Life After 50. In a section appropriately called, Building Momentum, the authors elaborate on the strategies provided in the What You Can Do Tomorrow portion.
The key in the Embrace the Momentum Mindset Hack is to review the goals you set and create a plan of action. Decide how you'll learn to play an instrument, what class you might take, where to grow your garden, or any other lofty goal you've set.
Embracing a Momentum Mindset makes life more fun, engaging, fulfilling, and adaptable. Now, how about a little Momentum in life's second or third act?
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We're hacking annoying neighbors. In an upcoming Sunday Morning Life Hacks post, we'll help you mend fences without confrontation. Stay tuned.
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